My heart melts...

Last night, Chloe had her big Cherub Choir performance. I rushed into the sanctuary after my bible study to find Ben had gotten us great seats up front. His parents were there too, so Chloe was excited to show off her singing talent. As the cherub's took their places on stage, she saw us almost instantly. She raised her hand, a big smile came across her face and she started waving like crazy. Of course, we were all waving back to let her know all of our eyes were on her.

Then, it happened, my heart started melting. I wanted to, once again, bottle this moment. She's at the age where she doesn't care who's watching, she's going to wave at her momma and daddy.

Ben and I talked about it when we got home. I asked him if his heart melted too. He said it did, then he started waving at me, hoping it would bring the same effect. (It didn't)...I love him to death! But it came no where close...

Then I started asking myself, Am I supposed to be so in love with this child? Is it right? The bible is clear, that I'm supposed to love God first, then Ben and our girls. I have to really keep myself in check sometimes. It's a hard thing to do.

"He who loves his father or mother more than Me is not worthy of Me. And he who loves son or daughter more than Me is not worthy of Me." Matthew 10:37

Last night in our bible study class, we studied Hannah. She must have been a woman of great strength. She wept and cried out to the Lord in anguish because she had no children. She made a vow to the Lord if he would give her a male child, that she would give him back. That's exactly what she did. You can read about it in 1 Samuel 1. She had prayed and prayed for her child, then after he was weaned she carried him up to the temple to offer him back to the Lord. Can you imagine? I can't...But it's what we are called to do.

Ben often says, be prepared, the Lord may have something big planned for Chloe. He might call her into the mission field to go back to China. Let me just say, this scares me to death when he says it. I don't even want to think about it! How would I ever have as much faith as Hannah?

Thankfully, I don't have to worry for a while! For now, we'll just stick with the Cherub Choir....

Happy Spring

Ok, I'm a little last posting this. But it's hard posting everyday.

The first day of spring(March 20) Chloe and I went to the Clock Tower to stand eggs on end. We had a great time. Chloe got some expert egg standing advice from a local artist here in Rome, Susan Gilbert Harvey.



I was skeptical about standing an egg on it's end, but it did really work!


It's supposed to have something to do with the Vernal Equinox...Webster's says of the Equinox~
The time when the sun crosses the equator, making night and day of equal length in all parts of the earth...


Of course we know who set this all in motion...
"Then God said, "Let there be lights in the firmament of the heavens to divide the day from the night; and let them be for signs and seasons, and for days and years;" Genesis 1:14

Ancient Paths for Modern Women

I'm so excited about the new bible study offered at my church. It's a small group of devout Christian Women. It's a four part study, each being 7 or 8 weeks. I actually didn't do the first two. I don't know why because after going last night, I realized what I've been missing. This third part is called ~Walking as Mothers and Homemakers. I'm anticipating what God is going to teach me. Chapter one is, Love Your Children, Doing all that I can do to ensure God's blessing in the lives of my children.

"the older women likewise, that they be reverent in behavior, not slanderers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things- that they admonish the young women to love their husbands, to love their children, to be discreet, chaste, homemakers..." Titus 2:3-5

I know God has been preparing me for this. It's perfect how I can look back and see how God has lead me. As I've watched Chloe flourish at church, just over the past few months, it completely amazes me! She's turned into a little evangelist. She's asked her Nana, point blank, if she has Jesus in her heart. She's been asking whether or not every member of our family has Jesus in their heart. She's been so interested in heaven. Every time we get into our car, she says "turn it on Praise You in this storm". She sings it at the top of her lungs. Every time the song mentions heaven, she says, "Momma, that's where we're going".

From the moment we brought Chloe home, I have always thought, she was OUR responsibility. I didn't want to send her to daycare, I didn't want someone else to raise her. I want to raise her. Ben and I have been so blessed by two mother's who are willing and able to keep Chloe on the two days a week I do work. They will never know what it has meant to me. I'm not being judgemental about parents who send their children to daycare, because I think God calls us to different things. It's just my calling to raise my daughter.

"There are diversities of gifts, but the same Spirit. There are differences of ministries, but the same Lord. And there are diversities of activities, but it is the same God who works all in all."
1 Corinthians 12:4-6

I want to marry daddy...

We had a wonderful meal last night. Ben's mother prepared his father a fabulous birthday dinner. I wonder when I'm going to be able to cook as good as my mother and mother in law. I'm just not quiet there yet. (I'm really not anywhere close)...

Anyway, on the way, in the car last night we got into a discussion about our girls one day marrying. It's a tough subject for Ben. Honestly, I know he wants them to one day marry Godly men. We pray daily for their future mates. It's weird sometimes praying for that, but we think it's very important. Of course, it would be fine if they waited until they are forty something before tying the knot! We are realist though, and know it will more than likely be much sooner than that. Chloe was really trying to understand this whole marriage thing. She said she wanted to marry her daddy. I told her, "your daddy is my husband, you'll have a different husband, but I'm sure your daddy would love to help you pick one out." (I thought of the movie "Fireproof" because the little girl in the story wanted to marry her daddy too.) Chloe seemed to be satisfied with that answer and said if she couldn't marry her daddy then she wants one just like him. It was a sweet moment. I pray they do find a Godly man like their daddy. He's such a great husband and father. He strives daily to be the man God wants him to be. He reads his bible daily and has strong convictions. He lives out his faith. I sometimes look around and realize how very blessed I am.

The pictures pretty much speak for themselves.....

"To everything there is a season..."Ecclesiastes 3:1

You Need to Thank God

Tonight as we were working on Chloe's weekly bible verse for Cubbies, the instructions had us get a picture of her when she was a baby to glue into her Awana's book. As I'm looking through the China photos, I really didn't want to give any of them up. I kept looking and finally found one that we could place in the book. I had this overwhelming feeling of love for her. I looked at her and said, "Chloe, I'm so glad God let me be your Momma", she responded, "You need to thank God for making me!" She always reminds me who, by some great miracle, made this all happen. I do thank God for her!

"I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well." Psalm 139:14

It's my turn

I was sadly reminded tonight of what a mean cruel place the world can be. Ok, it might not be that bad, but my heart was broken for my little girl. There were two other girls in Chloe's gymnastics class tonight. It was working out just fine until they discovered there were two small bean bags to play with. Hmmm, two bean bags, three girls. It should have worked out perfectly, two could play with the bean bags while one girl took her turn practicing her cartwheel, or on the beam. When it was Chloe's turn, both little girls got to play with a bean bag. When Chloe's turn was over one of the other little girls was up. She should have handed the bean bag she was playing with to Chloe, however, she handed it to the other girl to "hold" while she did her turn. I was horrified watching from the bleachers seeing my little precious angel wanting to play with the bean bag, while the other girl playfully dangled it in front of her face. My heart started racing, I was getting so angry. This went on and on for the rest of the class. I've always taught Chloe how important it is to share. I didn't know what to do. After the class on the way home, Chloe and I talked about the incident. She said, "Momma, I want you to get on to that girl." I said, "Chloe, I won't always be around to defend you. Sometimes you'll have to stick up for yourself." "The important thing is that YOU shared. And I'm very proud of you for that!"
I wish all the world was rosey, especially for my little angel, but sadly, it won't always be...The world is a mean place sometimes...This makes me think of the verse,

"Let nothing be done through selfish ambition or conceit, but in lowliness of mind let each esteem others better than himself. Let each of you look out not only for his own interests, but also for the interests of others. Philippians 2:3-4

The Fortress

This is the fort Chloe and I built today. She was so excited. I remember building such forts at home when I was little. All it takes is sheets and chairs. It's easy and cheap entertainment. And brings joy for hours....



Chloe watching a movie in the Fort with her cabbage patch doll...



Raggedy Anne also joined in the fun...





"In you, O Lord, I put my trust;
Let me never be ashamed;
Deliver me in Your righteousness.
Bow down Your ear to me,
Deliver me speedily;
Be my rock of refuge,
A fortress of defense to save me.
For You are my rock and my fortress;
Therefore, for Your name's sake,
Lead me and guide me."
Psalm 31:1-3